Re - evaluation

It's 1:55 a.m. on December 24 and suddenly it's time to re - evaluate.

I realize that tomorrow night I have the potential to be up a bit later than normal so sleep is something that should be happening now. However, it's not working.

I believe that Heavenly Father tells us when there is something we should do. I also believe that some of us are much better than others at seeing/feeling that and following the prompting.

So tonight, for awhile, it's time to ponder the missed prompting and try to make it right.

I'm so grateful for all of the blessings we have had in 2014 and as I sit and ponder the year, I just have to wonder if I have done enough for others around me. I want everyone around me to always know how glad I am to have them in my life. I want people to feel loved when they are around me. I hope I didn't miss too many of Heavenly Father's promptings,  and I hope in the future that I am more aware of others needs and what I can do to be a better friend,  neighbor, and family member.

I love Christmas and I hope everyone feels how much their Savior loves them always, but especially now.

Xox,
Kal

Marry Up

If I had been asked, "who I wanted to be in life?" In high school, I would have given you a completely different answer than who I am. People always list the things they would go back and change if they could, and I have always thought if something changed, I wouldn't be where I am now. And, while I didn't love the road it took to get here, I absolutely could not think of a person more perfect in this world than Case. And, funny enough,  he's probably not perfect for everyone, but he is for me. So, if I had to go back and change something,  I would maybe warn myself of what's to come. There will be a storm that has to pass before this all gets good.

Dear 16 year old Kalli,

It doesn't matter. None of it. Switch your classes to an easier load.  This is high school, and you need to have fun too. You aren't going to be a doctor, but I promise something much better is in store. Stop spending your money on food. You'll always need to remember that lesson in life. :) If someone makes you cry on your birthday, hit them. Sure, hitting isn't nice, but neither is being an ass hole.

You are going to meet a few good men along the way. You won't understand the decisions you make, because they are hurtful, but you may have to let a few people down in order to get where you need to be.

You will meet bad ones. You will feel alone. You will be in situations that you won't know how to get out of. You won't know the depth of the situation for a long time. You won't be able to get out of a bad situation. You will finally give in to thinking that this is how it's supposed to be. Then something will happen, and one cold sunday night you will say things you weren't planning on saying. Someone is there to help you. You will realize that this was exactly the time it had to be done, and why you were unable to end it so many times before. When that time happens, run like hell and don't look back.  You will always know the love your Heavenly Father has for you. After that, you will know that he never left you. He just needed you there for a minute.

You will meet someone. You won't settle. At all. I promise that even during the dark times, if you could know what's coming, it's so worth it. Casey is so worth it. He is exactly the person you are supposed to be with. He's calm; he is the moderation to your crazy. And, his love is eternal. He makes you one million times better. And, he was worth the wait.

--

I think there are so many times we want to change our story, our choices, but they were important and necessary to be exactly  where we are, which is where we need to be. I know if I had done even one little thing different, I wouldn't have married Case. And, this love is better than any I could have found myself in.

Always know your own worth, and marry someone who is worthy of your love.

Marry Up.

Because it's that much better.

Happy love month.

Xoxo

Blessings

Cough, oh hey abandoned blog. I must get better.

A few weeks ago, Casey and I were able spend the day at the temple assisting with tours. My task was "disability services". I absolutely had a terrific day, but we (the church and I) DEFINITELY have different definitions of my job title. :) Moving on. My job was to direct people using wheelchairs towards the elevator. 

(Note: I'm not being negative. I just thought I would have to provide a lot of different assistance. Ie. Assist more, not point to an elevator)

Gramma Holmes came by about halfway through my shift. I may or may not have skipped (I would never run in the temple. Or admit to it) down the hall the hug and greet her. She also may or may not have held up the elevator for a second or two. I just love her what can I say? And, if you don't know about LDS temples, we heart the family in the temp. Anyways, it was quality.

Throughout the day, I had several expectant mothers. One had many children.  One, just her husband with her. She then told us they had a child much older and had been trying for MANY years to get pregnant again. I mean like double digit number of years. This mother was expecting twins. I cried.

I believe we are given many reminders of our Heavenly Father's love in our daily life. We just have to remember to look for them. I know that woman was touring the temple for her that day, and she was able to gain a better understanding, or feel the spirit, but I also know our paths crossed for a very specific reason in God's plan.

Case and I would love to have a baby. How much medical assistance we put into the endeavor is up to us. However, I know we will have a family. I know a baby will come exactly when he/she is supposed to during our life. The timeline won't be mine, and it won't be Casey's.  But it was predetermined before this life and I knew exactly what that timeline would be. And, it's perfect. I don't know how or why, but it is.

I hope that I can always think of others. Especially when it comes to babies. I know tons of friends who have waited and waited for babies. Often in my prayers I say "they get a baby first". And, I truly pray that everyone gets their babies, exactly when they are supposed to, and I hope it's perfect.

I'm so thankful for all of the blessings we have. I'm grateful for reminders of how much Heavenly Father loves each one of us. I'm happy to know that I am never alone. I hope that others are able to feel their Heavenly Father's love, and feel it often.

And, mostly, I hope those adorable twins were the perfect addition to that family, and they came right at the perfect time.

Couponing

I took a coupon class way back at the beginning of this year at my friend Ashley's. She also knows the Coupon Gal and she taught the class! (Ash teaches classes now too!) 

So, it's like couponing for your everyday person. NOT like crazy couponer on t.v. It was great to learn the rules, and which coupons/sales can go together. It made so much sense so quickly. And really, so easy. Everyone should do it. 

At the class, I ordered 4 newspapers every Sunday. They were only $20 for the year for each one. Plus, we all know I have no concept of money or how much of a stockpile 2 people need. (Just so we are clear, not 4 papers worth but whatever.) I also got a gift card for buying so many papers. I love gift cards. Always there for rainy days. 

Then, after my class, a bad thing happened. I gave up on couponing. I just got "too busy". He would never say it, but I know Case was disappointed. $80 wasted. About a week ago, I finally got my butt in gear. The time commitment is small. 

-Sunday: half hour sorting the paper. All I do, is pull out coupons. Stack them together,  put the good parts of newspaper in my paint pile (to use under my paint projects later), and show away those shiny ad pieces. You can look at the ads before tossing of course. 

- Tuesday: this is the day I try to plan on shopping each week. After you pick your favorite stores, you can see which day the new ad starts. I go on Tuesdays because Case has church activities. Go which day works for you. 

I've only gone twice so far. So my expert advice is limited. My first time, I had to organize those coupons I ignored for 6 months, and it took me longer because I was new. It took about 2 hours, then maybe 1 hour to shop. My second time took me 1.5 hours total. Once you have done it, you start to get the hang of it quick. So, I would say plan on 30minutes to an hour to organize then 1-2 hours in the store. And, go alone!! You do have to pay attention a little bit more than you would on a normal trip. 

Also, you only use 4 coupons for each item. (Like only 4 bottles of shampoo, etc) so you aren't emptying the shelves and leaving everyone else with nothing like the crazies on t.v. And, you only have to get what you need. Much better! 

If you want a class, contact Ashley Nielsen. You can find her on facebook @ ThisMom Coupons.

Also, the link to Coupon Gal's website @ Utah Deal Diva

I refresh my memory with these instructions often and it's way helpful. 

Now, for the nitty gritty of my first trip! The retail value with no sales/coupons was over $132! I spent $57.98! 

I got:

- 4 bottles of laundry soap

- 3 bottles of body wash

- 4 packages of diaper wipes 

- 2 boxes of Cheerios

- bread (because we love carbs, no sale)

-milk (again. no sale. just needed)

- yogurt

-Roast

- 2 bags of grapes

- 3 peaches

-lunch meat (it was on sale, but it wasn't a huge bargain)

- 3 bottles of febreeze air freshener

- 3 bags of candy

- dryer sheets

- a box of crayons (I needed a new set for Primary)

- cream cheese

- water flavoring

- and, shave gel

Thunder

Thunder Thighs.

Obviously, if you've met me or if you've read my posts you know I carry most of my weight on my bottom half. I mean, right now, I'm kind of across the board looking to tone, but I've always had a thigh problem. It kind of just came with big booty territory back in the day.

Many of you, Adriana Lima aside, probably maybe feel my pain. Who seriously has a thigh gap? Is that a thing? Mine thighs know each other better than Cinderella knows Prince Charming. They have NEVER not touched. EvER. I found a childhood picture of me at Disneyland, swimming. I was 2 or 3. My thighs touched. And, I wasn't a chubby kid. Seriously, I was a toddler. It was after seeing that picture that I began to just go with it. They are always going to touch and it's okay.

Pinterest also helps. 

http://i-like-catts.tumblr.com/post/55735945209

Little Mermaid is obviously my favorite Disney movie.

As the years and weight have progressed, my legs started to flabby touch. At least when I was in high school they were a bit more firm and elastic. Then they became so "oh. Oh dear", "bless her heart" kinda style. In pants, they were okay,  but good laws keep me out of swimwear.

I ran a 5k a month ago. They were still a bit saggy for my liking. Today, they still aren't close to where I want them. I put on a pair of running shorts though and they looked smooth. Kind of firm, not tight yet, but firm.

And, it's taken 3 months of running. It's been a 4 pound weight gain instead of weight loss.

But it's okay. I was able to look in that full length mirror and not be embarrassed.  I was able to see improvement.

So, keep going. My legs didn't become jello salad with cottage cheese overnight.  (You are so welcome for just ruining that fattening food for you) It WILL Get better. You can look exactly how you want to look. And be okay with shimmying into your jeans.

Some men kinda like those big booty bitc.... op, almost got inappropriate. I mean, you look great!

♡ yourself!

And, just keep going!

Weekly Goals 8.24.14- 8.30.14

Have you guys felt alone and abandoned and left to set goals all by yourself?

I'm sorry. I've been lazy. Flat out that's all there is to it. I don't have a reason, an excuse. It just is what it is. Be mad or move forward.

If you are new to goals you can read the rules {here}.

Since I have 100% just been no goalin' it for the past two weeks, I am going to start some fresh ones.

1. Run 3 times this week. Morning or Night. For at least 30 minutes.
2. Vitamins. Seriously, I NEVER take them and they are important and it's not just about me. Not that it's entirely irrational but I would feel insanely stressed if we were to have a baby and I wasn't super religious about taking them.
3. Less than 44 oz. of soda a day. Pray for me on this one. It gets me through the day.

I am starting this small, but really get on my case if I bail on dedicated blogging/ getting skinny again.






I need it!

Check in with your goals, Below.

BYU Cupcakes

Sometimes, I don't eat or make healthy things. And sometimes, I blog about them. Even though they are unhealthy. I think you have to live a little. It's okay to eat bad things occasionally, right?

Casey's cousin graduated from BYU a few months ago. And by graduated, I actually mean-- in 2 years, with the highest honors possible, an insane double major, and with a scholarship. Home girl is brilliant. I offered to take cupcakes to her graduation party after. It's not like I could keep up with the dinner conversation so I had to do something. {Read above: SUPER SMART}

I REALLY wanted to find BYU flags to go in the cupcakes, but Zurchers let me down. So blue geometrics it was.

To Make Matching Cupcakes:

- Betty Crocker white cake mix. ADD blue food coloring
      *if I did it again, I wouldn't dye the cupcakes. They almost looked burnt.
- Wilton Frosting Recipe.
     - take out vanilla/butter flavoring and pick up MANGO from {here} or from a specialty store.
- Cupcake liners and stripe flags : ZURCHERS
- blue sprinkles: Kitchen Kneads (but really, anywhere)
- Frosted with a Wilton tip #

I would love to tell you the cupcakes were amazing. However, I don't often eat food that I make. I realize that's weird and I need to eat food I make instead of fast food in order to be healthy. I'm not scared of my kitchen or do anything bad, I'm just kind of weird. However, the batter from licking the spatula (after, you grossies) was bomb, as was the frosting alone. They were VERY sweet. So, depending on food tastes, might not be everyone's fave. Husb was, as always, my pre party taste tester. He loved them. And, they did get some pretty good reviews at the party.

Congrats, O! 

Apple Cinnamon Water

picture from Pinterest: www.tonetiki.com


I found this water recipe Pinterest and shockingly enough I REALLY like it! It really makes me drink more water, and tastes so much better then plain old tasteless water!

It's just water. Add 1-2 cut apples, a few cinnamon sticks and let it sit overnight.
 Disclaimer: the expensive apples are the money maker in this drink!

 It's probably easiest to just search "apple cinnamon water". So yummy!!!

Goals 8.3- 8.10

Oh, Hey.

I've been dreading this post all day. It's time to hold myself accountable though and check in. If you want to the skinny on how I do my goals go here and to see my first goal check in go here.

This week's goals went better, but oh how the repeats make me angry!

1. Work Out 4 times/ Week. Can I get a WHAT?! I so passed off this goal!
     - Monday: Running
     - Tuesday: class
     - Wednesday: Running
     - Thursday: break
     -Friday: Running
I won't lie. Wednesday almost killed me. I was TIRED from all my days in a row. However, I can't even begin to describe my excitement for completing this goal! I feel like a freakin Victoria Secret model. Don't worry. I realize I'm not. I won't be pretend modeling at your local pool anytime soon.
2. Pack 2 Healthy Lunches this Week. I honestly can't even remember what I ate 1 day last week. Apparently, it wasn't memorably healthy. I don't know if I ate lunch everyday. I think I had In N Out Burger one day?
3. Water- Before or After Run. SUCCESS! I had one glass before or after each run. I also drank water more throughout the day. Go Team. Be real though, I think I maxed out at 20 ounces.
4. Be in Bed by Midnight three times. I did well on this goal on Sunday, and Monday. Tuesday wasn't as good because I was helping Casey get ready for scout camp. The rest of the week my sleep was off because I watched t.v. every night. I was having a good time; I got to pick all the shows! When Case got home Saturday, I was asleep by midnight. Scout Camp wore the guy out. He slept all day and we were in bed by 11. Goal = complete.

This Weeks Goals:
1. Pack 2 Healthy Lunches . Repeat of the Century.
2. Water- I completed this goal BUT I need to measure so I can get better. Each day I am going to drink a 16.9 oz bottle. I think I'm already doing it. I need a starting point though.
3. Be in bed by midnight each night. ALL 7! I need more sleep. I'm getting old.
4. Work out 4 times a week for 2 weeks in a row! Last week will count towards this goal, so basically I want to do 4 workouts again.

See you in 7 days!

Marriage and Fitness. Part 1

When Case and I got married, he was sporting roughly 4 nights a week. He has since slowed down because obviously he likes being home with his lady friend.  However, we have both gained substantial amounts of LB's because of it. (Me because I've never worked out; Him because his routine changed and he didn't marry Rachael Ray.)

Last summer, we trained for a 5k for 1 week together. I absolutely love Case. He is perfect for me. However, I think we have what a lot of couples figure out-

WE DO NOT WORK OUT TOGETHER.

Shock factor: that didn't ruin our marriage. It doesn't mean we aren't in love.

Casey is my biggest supporter when I roll out of bed to go running 3 times a week. He makes sure I get out of bed. He asks me how it went. Sometimes, I even get breakfast after. But he also doesn't come.
It didn't work for us. Case has to slow way down for me. He grew up active and playing tons of sports. I am the least coordinated person ever. Also, he's 6 ft. .. I'm at least 3 steps to his 1.

When Case and I have run races (cough, 5k's) together we do stick together. Otherwise, we workout 100% seperate.

It used to bother me. I felt like we weren't in sync enough. I felt like a "fat wife". Like he didn't care to stay the same pace as me and run together. Now, I just realize we have different body types/ styles/ preferences. And it's okay. I still love him. He still loves me. We both encourage each other to be our best self. And that's what matters.

That being said,

I like:
-running with the ladies
-gym classes with friends

He likes:
- soccer
-softball
-golf
-taking the dogs on a run

And

- he's going to try crossfit.

Wish him luck! I can't wait to watch him on the Crossfit games on ESPN! That sure doesn't mean I'll be hitting up lady crossfit games anytime soon. ;)

Let's discuss the Bums

Sometimes, maybe I offend people. Sorry about that. Today may be one of those times.

You can ask most men if they are a "boob guy" or an "ass man". [There I go with my sailor mouth. Butt Guy sounds dumb. It is what it is.] They generally notice that particular area first. It doesn't really matter, they usually like both anyways.  But if forced to tell you what they prefer, there always is one.

Most women, unless half is fake, aren't going to have both. Sure, both can be good. However, one is usually exceptionally better. The fat just can't distribute all perfect like I guess. I realize there are ladies with great both, but I feel like you could walk up to most women and ask which one gets the compliments. And don't be ridiculous with me and say "neither" or try to be modest and embarrassed that I'm talking about this, you KNOW which one gets the compliments when the Mr. gets home.

My friends used to joke in junior high and say bra sizes were like grades and "Kalli was a straight A student". Sigh. True life. But whilst it was hard buying the most expensive push up bra Victoria Secret offered, I always had that bum.

Be real,  it wasn't Kim Kardashian big {which is sooo okay because to be honest, yikes} but it was there. It was a bubble. And, I didn't have to work for it. I used to roll my eyes and butt workouts on Pinterest. How embarrassing that we couldn't just be happy. Why was everyone trying to Kardashian their bum?

I had an intervention with myself a few months ago. It was a harsh one. Where in the H*/\ did my butt go?? I have had a desk job for almost 2 years. It's like it flattened out to a teacher butt!  [Note: I know plenty of teacher friends that have fine behinds. Please don't get all offended like.] It's still big (cough, extra 40 pounds) but it's like it got smashed out because I was sitting on it too much. It's wide and flat. My back to butt, what back to butt?  It's gone. It's chub to bum!  How could this happen? It was just how I was built. It was just there. And it's gone.

Let's confess, I started to look at those butt workouts. I'm ashamed. But I had to. I need it back. I can't even bring myself to pin them. What if I exercise it wrong and it comes back looking worse? What if it gets all big? I just want a perfectly nice bubble style. I'm terrifed here people. These pinterest exercises promise so much, but do they deliver?

Obviously, I haven't done tons to correct this HUGE problem yet, but I am going to keep you posted. And if you guys have solutions, list them below. Help a sister out!

K, feel better getting that off my chest.

♡

Gum and 20

Attention World:

Today, I, Kalli, RAN for 20 minutes straight. As soon as you wake up from passing out due to shock, join me.

Like I've told you, I've been doing Couch 2 5K with my neighbs. We've gone much slower than most but we are doing it. Today was- 5 min walking warm up, run 20 minutes, 5 min cool down. We did 2.56 miles total. Just like we were supposed to be, we did about a 10 minute mile. The .56 was our warm up and cool down.

It was one of those plug in and go type runs. So, I'd like to thank:
- Rhianna. Only Girl in the World.
-Justin Moore. Back that Thing Up.
- Brandon and Leah. BOOM, Boom, Boom.
- the United States Marine Corp.  Their running cadences. Guys, seriously. Amaze. 
-Lady A. Bartender
-Lee Brice. I don't dance.

<ps- I run to weird tunes. But I'm into it. And I've defined my style. Make a play list and shuffle>
<<pps- make a playlist. If you just shuffle, every other song is a primary or steven Curtis Chapman number,  fab for the sabb . Not for my running psyche>>

I would also like to thank my brother in law. Gum! Chew it on your runs. Keeps your throat from drying out. I'd like to compare a 20 min run with no gum, but today was quality so why mess with a good thing.

And of course,  my running peeps. I would have quit, but I couldn't be the first one to start walking.

The only thing I hated was the app telling me "you are halfway". It got into my brain and I was almost at the give up point. As soon as I pushed through that, I kept telling myself "this is the easy part", "downside of the run" and I was fine.

And just in case you wondered about our sexy future fitness model appeal: when it warned us we had 1 minute left, we decided to really run, like all Olympic style. It seriously felt great. And was so not as hard as I thought it was going to be. (Except for my almost comatose stare at work until noon.)

Moral of the story: you can do it! It took us sooo long to build to 20 minutes,  but now I know I can keep going! Just keep doing it. I pinky promise it does get easier.

Last, I have started weighing myself every Monday. I'm going to also take a picture. I'm going to compare the two every week. I'm not going to weigh in between. I, like most, get way caught up on that number. I've gained 4.6 pounds in 2 weeks and I need to just realize I FEEL BeTTER. So, feel free to participate! Obviously, it will start today, but won't really be posted until next week.

Good luck this week!

Goals :: 7.27-8.3

First things first, if you don't know how weekly goals work around these parts, go {here}.

Second, and painfully so, reviewing last week's goals-

1. Work out 4 times this week. 

      I bailed on Wednesday running so I ran Monday, Friday, and went to a class Tuesday. This goal is a big old repeat. 

2. Pack a healthy lunch 2 days this week. 

     Yeah, I forgot I made this goal. I should write them down so I can see them and not just on the line. My bad. Continue on round 2. 

3. Water- 1 glass before running or showering everyday. 

     I did this Monday. 5:45 was way hard for me to choke down 1 gulp. I'm not awake enough. Obviously, I have to repeat this goal, but I need to modify it in order to make any progress happen. 

So, it looks like a lot of repeating for me and that's okay. Let's try again. 

1. Work out 4 times this week. 

     I have plans to run my usual Monday, Wednesday, and Friday plus I'm signed up for a Tuesday night class. As long as I don't bail Wednesday I am set to succeed. 

2. Healthy Lunches 2 days this week. 

     This goal sucks and caloric killer food is way more better. However, my scale is reminding me that it's not the case. Hot bodies are made in the kitchen. 

3. Water- 1 glass before/ after run

     I did drink more water this week so I don't feel bad about modifying this one and making it work for me. I want to succeed! 

4. NEW! Be in bed by midnight 3 times this week. This means in bed! Not on the couch relaxing to t.v, not washing face, but IN BED. We usually start going to bed at 12 and get there by 12:30- 12:45. I want good sleep this week! Note: work emergencies or other emergencies, should they happen, will NOT count against me. 

This week in order to be successful, I'm going to go ahead and write these down on a post it for myself. Obviously, I don't check back on my goals. I'm not making excuses. I should have done better. I just want to explain where the performance did not meet the expectation and what I should do better in order to get the desired outcome. 

Go ahead and tell me how your goals went, or self report in your fitness journal. HOLD YOURSELF ACCOUNTABLE. This is your week. Make it work for you. 

Good Luck! 

Kalli

How Running Got Started

I know, I know. You have all been feeling so abandoned since I took the holiday and Friday off of blogging. Practically crying yourselves to sleep I'm sure.

Sorry. I just took a little day off, but now I'm weekend posting you to make up for it. So, that deserves some cookies or something. . . Just sayin.

I've had a bunch of people say to me lately "oh, I'm not a runner." Well, why the heck not? What makes a runner? You don't have to do sprints or marathons to be a runner, you don't have to be fast. Heck, you don't even have to get very far. You just have to move.

I know some of you are saying- but I'm too big, I'll do videos first then run. Or you think you look funny.

NEWS FLASH: No one cares! For certain, I have not had one person come to me while running and say "you sound like a camel dry heaving on the desert". When I'm on trails, people only have time to say "hi" then you are past them. I'll I'm saying is I have insecurities to, and I finally stopped letting them stop me. And I'm so glad I did. Because I'm still not the perfect size, but I feel better. And everyone deserves that.

However, we can Monday pep talk it more. Today's the day I'm really honest about the misery of running.

I have never been good at exercise. I was the slowest mile runner in junior high and high school. Which, by the way, public school system- give it up. I'm 5 ft. How in the blankity blank blank fast do you think I can run? My legs are only like 1.5 ft of that.  Don't be ridiculous. Anyways, my gym teacher once called me "cow" instead of "kal" so there's that. And just so we are really clear, that back when my size wasn't even a number yet. So, running isn't my dream workout. I never understood it. I was one of those "not a runner" people.

Last summer, my in laws REALLY wanted the whole fam to do a 5K on the 4th of July. Case and I agreed. We trained all of three times (couch to 5k, week 1). It was absolutely terrible. I was so embarrassed and thought everyone thought I was so fat. Again, no one really cares. I needed to get over myself. After the 5K, I swore I was not a runner and I would never do it again.

Fast forward. Over the winter, I bought some beach body videos. I used them. Then stopped. ... yeah. I do that a lot. I just kept gaining weight.  I didn't feel happy. I started going to a workout class with friends from work. I started to feel a bit more confident and I could feel myself getting some muscle,  but still not enough yet. I felt better, but you know you want instant magic skinny too. Then my neighbors approached me and told me they had just started the C25K program,  and asked if I wanted to join. They convinced me by saying "we aren't runners. It will just be fun". Okay... it's now or never.

The first week, they told me Week 1 was too easy and we could surely hack Week 2.

NO, NO, No. I could not. We had to go back to Week 1. My lungs could not do it! That Breathing Thing runners do- it takes a long time to learn how to do that.

I've told you before, we repeated weeks. If something was killing us, we did it again. We started running in May. It's the end of July. We still aren't done. And it's OKAY. Only compare yourself to yourself.

I felt miserable those first few weeks. Everyone said running made them feel less stress, more calm. That they felt better on days they ran, that they ate better. They felt happier. Remember, it's going to be miserable for a minute. You are asking your body to do something you don't normally do. It gets better. I really promise.

If you are new to running, this is my advice. And this is coming from me. Not Malibu barbie at the gym. Me, a real person, who still has 40 pounds to lose. I'm not only in your boat but I'm freakin rowing it to shore.

1. Don't Give Up! I know you want to after every day. Something strange will happen. Your long runs will become your short ones.  And then your short ones become even longer. You won't even remember the 1 minute runs.
2. Accountability Partner. For me, I am so not a self motivator. But my friends were counting on me, waiting for me outside. I had to go. I couldn't let them down. And, on our runs--no way I was giving up first.
3. Breathing: I know it feels wrong. You feel like your lungs just aren't getting enough air. Slow your run and concentrate. It gets better. Keep at it. I promise. In your nose, out your mouth. Slow. Just like normal.
4. Take Breaks: I started to feel like I wasn't progressing fast enough. So I would do Week 2 on M, W, F and Week 1 on T, Th. I figured I would be fine since Week 1 had become my easy run. One of my runner besties (cough, thanks Jess) told me to stop. I'm glad she did. Bodies need a break. Even if you aren't feeling tired or sore that next day, make sure you are resting. Cross train, sure, but get into it slowly. McDonald's didn't make you overweight overnight. One run won't fix it.
5. Enjoy yourself: don't beat yourself up. It's just running. There will be bad days. And it's okay. Have fun. Really. It will be.

So, how do I feel now? [We are probably 10-12 weeks in and just finished week 5]  》
SO MUCH BETTER.
--> 5:40 a.m. wake up is still painful,  but it's doable. I'm back down to 2 alarms. (There was a minute there when I switched it to 3)
--> I love running clothes. I can't wait to look better in them, every time.
--> I can breathe! This was a hard one, and some times I lose my pattern on the longer parts of my run. Keep chugging along.
--> I sweat {AND smell like a foot}. That's new. I never work myself so hard that I sweat. I had to teach myself how, and it feels dang good!
--> I crave my run days, did I just become a runner?
--> "endorphins make you happy. Happy people don't kill their husbands."  -Elle Woods, Legally Blonde. It's true. I'm happy, I'm less stressed. You won't feel this way overnight,  but it comes and it's so good when it does.

Just keep going, wherever you are at with yourself--keep going! You can definitely be exactly who you want to be!

Ask And You Will Receive

Shut Up, you guys! Remember how just yesterday I was complaining that I wanted my fitbit to look less than a fitness band and more like a cute bracelet? Well, sure enough I got on the fitbit website today and Tory Burch is creating bands now. Of course, I waited all day to get home and take a look- - -yeah, the one I want is $195. I am pretty sure that is more than my fit bit cost, but look at it!

 www.toryburch.com . You can buy one {here}

I really want it. But not really because not only is $195 in the budget, but I could find a bunch of other wonderful goodness to buy with that money. However, if you are feelin it like me you should go get it. And you should think of me everytime you wear it! If you REALLY want one but need something a little cheaper they also have colored silicone ones for $38. They are cuter than the plain bands, and I may look into it once they have more colors. For now, I'll keep my boring plain colors and just be happy that I have a fitbit because I really do love it. Just when you see me with my plain one pretend it's that metal beauty you see above. Okay? Thanks best friend!

Tomorrow is a holiday in Utah so I better go pretend it's the weekend and hang out with that hottie that sleeps in my bed.
 
PS- let's excuse the spacing on the picture. I am NOT tech savvy and my computer is being all sketch fest. Just be grateful I showed you the most beautiful bracelet you've ever seen! 

Product Review: Fitbit

Today, I went to a workout class. I died. Of course, after I stopped and picked up pizza for dinner. Casey was with the young men at our church and didn't get home until later. Can I please describe the embarrassing events that transpired. 

- I was in booty shorts and proceeded to throw on sweats in the parking lot of Little Caesars.  Bystanders probably thought ho was gettin dressed. 

- I bought pizza after a workout. I think I cancelled myself a bit on that one. 

- I chose to eat in front of the television. I have to catch up on my Sister Wives when Casey isn't home. Then the young women of our church dropped off a paper. Oh, hey guys. Hey. 

Winning, just winning. That's a side story though. I really have something of value to report on.

For Christmas last year, Casey gave me a jawbone speaker. I had been complaining (I don't remember that part) that I wanted to listen to some tunes at work. I really loved it, but I didn't think I would use it enough to justify how much it cost.

Side Note: Casey does extremely well with gift giving and I did love the speaker. I am 100% sure I would have enjoyed it and I am grateful he bought me something at all. I sound like a fart when I say we returned it. I really did like it.
So, off to Best Buy we went to exchange it for something else. Casey showed me a few other things he thought about buying. The fitbit flex was on the list. Like any smart husband, he did not put the weight loss device under the tree because, again, like any good husband he tells me I'm perfect. (I love him). Of course, that's what I chose. After about 4 days, we went back and bought Casey one too. It's fun comparing our stats each day. 

What is it:

 it's a wristband that you can wear all the time and it tracks the calories you are burning. The flex has changeable bands in case you are feeling trendy. You charge the little electronic piece about once a week. It can also track your sleep patterns, and steps. You can manually enter your calories consumed each day also. It has dots on the band that let you know how close to your goal you are.

Pros:
1. Idiot proof. I am NOT technology savvy at all.
2. Interchangeable band. I can match my outfit each day

      I have black, grey-blue, aqua, red, and navy. I want like 10 more colors!
3. Easy to put on. It takes 2 seconds, tops. Throw it on as you are running out the door.
4. Comfy. You can wear it to sleep. It measures how many times you are restless or wake up. It's absolutely fascinating to compare mine and Casey's. I'm kind of an obnoxious bed partner.
5. Did I mention easy?
6. You can find friends that will show up in your app. I'm a lame sauce, Case is my only friend. Add me if you have a fitbit!
7. There's an app! You can look at the dots throughout the day, but it also sync's to my phone so I am able to check my progress frequently.

Cons:
1. It's plain, but I still have an armband on. ... while I can match it to my outfit, it is what it is. It's probably not super noticeable, but sometimes it's just eh.
2. I went to a gym class for an hour tonight. It didn't show any of the class under "very active minutes". And it was! To be fair, the class wasn't cardio.
3. I don't use it to count my calorie intake, I like My Fitness Pal better. However, it is connected to my My Fitness Pal account, which makes that much easier.

Overall, I'm way happy with the purchase. I have gained 10 pounds since owning it, but I think that's a me issue, not the band. ;) I think someone a bit more advanced on their fitness may want a little something, something extra but for me-- happy camper!

Workout Wears

RUN, don't walk, to your nearest sporting goods store for these capris.

A few months ago, or 1.5, Casey and I went to the outlets for my birthday.  Under Armour was having a sale. I got an outfit,  but I REALLY wanted these neon pink pants. They weren't on sale,  but c'mon Breast Cancer support. I HAD to get them.

WORTH EVERY PENNY.

They are like butter melting on my skin. Melting on my cottage cheese thighs. Oh, that visual is quality. Haha.

So, this weekend, I went back to Under Armour and bought the same pair in grey. And they were on sale. 

Shirt: Utah State original. However, you can and SHOULD get this year's game day shirt {here}
Pants: Under Armour , similar {here}
Nike's: a present, but you can get the newer more legit looking version (or the closest I could find) {here}

Goals :: 7.21-7.27

Let's set goals together every Sunday, k?

Here's how this works- Start with a manageable number of goals. Maybe 1 goal a week is enough to add to your plate right now. Maybe you want 7. It's whatever you choose. {Side Note: I like odd numbers, 7 is actually my favorite. But I also like to be sporadic.} And really. It's whatever. BUT, if you don't accomplish your goal this week, you have to ADD it to next week's goal list. See how I did that?. Get it done and get it off the list! Pick goals that work for you. My goals probably won't work for most people. That's okay. We can all be different. Weird, right?

Just make it manageable!

I think a lot of folk have a tendency to create these huge goals then when we don't accomplish them we feel all fat friend like and give up on ourselves!

Helpful Hints//Cheats
1. If you feel overwhelmed, give yourself something you already do.
      - I am so not above adding "brush teeth" to my Saturday chore list. Then when I do it I can cross it off and feel that much better.
This isn't for everyone, it's a personality flaw of "list makers"
2. It doesn't all have to be exercise. Be real. What do you want to be doing better?
3. Make it manageable. For example- "loose 5 pounds" probably isn't for most people. However, "drink 2 extra glasses of water each day" may be for most people.

So, my weeks goals are:
1. Work out 4 times this week.
     -I've been mostly decent with running 3 days but this old girl needs to do some cross training.
2. Pack a healthy lunch 2 days this week.
    -Laugh away, but I eat out 5 days a week. To go from 5---0 in a week is too much so 2 is my go to number.
3. WATER- 1 glass before running or shower everyday.
   -I'm probably going to have a goal associated with water in some way for the rest of my life. I think water is stupid and I love soda. My attitude isn't changing. I'm not automatically going to start craving it so turning it into habit it is.

Novel's almost over. YOU are accountable for YOU. If you need an accountability team- find a friend, tell the significant other, journal it for the grandkids to find, or comment below. Bottom line: only you will know if you cheat and don't repeat a goal. So, just don't do it.

♡
Good Luck!

The Before

You know you have been wanting a before. And, eventually I'll probably give in and give you "the one" but in all reality I've watched my weight get higher and higher for the last 6 or so years. Its really gotten to the point where I need to make a change though. So, this is old me. Check back often and see the new and improved me.

It's just going to keep getting better!

♡

Also, just so its clear. These are MY befores. I jist picked 3 random pictures from my phone. Its not like I posted the bikini ones that really show where the extra weight is. Please don't judge them or criticize. This is me and I'm just sharing the journey. We are all differemt and it's okay! Let's just be best friends and only encourage each other to make changes and try harder each day! Deal?! 

I'm not golden, and it's okay

{DISCLAIMER: 2 Negative posts in a row. Yikes.}

In my free time, I work full time as an Associate Director. We don't need to get into details, but on any given weekday between 9-5 I am working-- in an office, meetings, at other establishments, working with the state. I also am married and have 2 dogs. Just like everyone else, there is a lot going on.
Some days I just wonder who has a voodoo doll of me and what on earth did I do to piss them off.
Today was that day.
1. I loathe when people are on your side right up to the point when it's time to stand for something. Then they crack and you find yourself standing completely alone trying to represent. It just sucks.
2. I absolutley, more than anything, hate being told something that I did wasn't done good enough. Literally, a one line email saying "get this done" effects me for weeks. WEEKS. I won't feel good enough, and I'll wonder why they didn't find someone better.
3. First world, but dishes?! Seriously, what the hell. Neverending.
4. I think that goes for all housework.
5. Why are there only 24 hours in a day? And why do I require so much sleep?
6. Why am I venting all these things instead of just feeling like I tried my best and it IS good enough?

So, moral of the story--> maybe today I wasn't the favorite employee, maybe today I wasn't the best wife,  maybe I didn't accomplish everything I wanted today. However, I did my best and that's enough. I try hard to make a difference and if I were perfect there would be no reason to work on anything tomorrow. I think sometimes we don't give ourselves enough credit. And we ALL deserve it. Every one of us has done something today that will, in fact, change the course of history. Maybe you smiled at someone who didn't feel like they had any friends. Maybe you gave a waitress a tip that was just enough money to finish paying the power bill. Maybe you are raising a child, maybe you went to work to feed your family. Whatever you did, it was enough and it was golden. It was exactly what you needed to be doing on this exact day in order to change the course of this world.

And, you are enough.

So, right now, you can sulk in a bubble bath or grab a soda, but when you are done create a list of 7 things that were enough today. Keep them to yourself, journal them, leave me a comment. But DO IT. Because you deserve to give yourself some credit.

1. I did, in fact, get the dishes done.
2. I talked to a friend for an hour on the phone. And, he's a great example.
3. No one in this world will love the Hub more than I do. And, I think he knows that, not just today, but everyday.
4. I planned a lunch with friends tomorrow.
5. I addressed a concern and hopefully made someone else feel more at ease.
6. I emptied my mailbox at work. (Which means I'm getting closer to everything that needed to be accomplished today)
7. I said a prayer to my Heavenly Father that I could be guided to do whatever I needed to get done today in order to be exactly where I need to be in order to help someone else. Because in the end, that's what matters.

You are golden. Always.

Frustration Day

I woke up this morning and felt so rested.

Last night, before bed, I swept, I did dishes, I felt great. I was doing a little soul searching and trying to think of ways I could accomplish more in each day. After, I watched t.v. on the couch with the hubs and he woke me up to go to bed at midnight.

It was his birthday, so of course I wished him Happy, Happy then fell right back asleep. I was excited to wake up and get a run in before my day at work and fattening birthday treats.

So, it felt super weird this morning when I woke up on my own. Yeah, 6:26. We go running at 6. I completely missed it. I feel so sad. The smart me would have went for a shorter, quick run around my neighborhood. But that older man in my bed looked like he could use some morning cuddling.

I bet we can all guess which me won.

Excuse me while I feel like a sad, fat sack all day for not running. Boo. Fail day. Fail day.

Workout Wears

I do NOT get all dolled up to workout. My running buddies should feel blessed that my teeth are brushed. I'll be real sometimes there's not even fresh deodorant, just yesterday's remainder. One thing I do is try to set out my clothes the night before. That way I don't have to worry about waking up the dog children or the hubs. Mondays are particularly rough. Skanky shirts usually help. ;)

This was Monday's outfit--
Shirt: one of those online t shirt shops. It's old, so I can't remember exactly where. I want to say Zazzle
Capri's: Calvin Klein from TJMaxx
Nike's: Christmas present from the Hub.

And just so we are clear, I WOULD in fact do whatever Ron told me to do.

How I Became A "Runner"

So, truth be told- - I am ABSOLUTELY not a star runner. I had a roommate, Jessica, that was a rockstar runner in college and I always admired how she would wake up super early and get a workout in.

Last summer, the hubs convinced me to run a 5K in his home town.We "trained" for maybe 1 week. We ran 3 times and only a walk/run for a mile each time. I realize that people roll their eyes at 3.2 miles but my goodness I DIED! I finished and completely stopped running after. I promised myself I would never do it again in my whole life. A t-shirt is not worth 20 bucks and an hour of misery.

Then this past May two of my neighbors asked me to do Couch 2 5K with them. They were so sweet and promised me they weren't runners either. It was just for fun and to get fit. I'll go into more depth later, but it really has been a great experience. We've missed days, we've re-done weeks but we ARE getting there. More importantly, we aren't giving up.

So, I guess I'm sort of a runner!

About Me

Hi. I'm Kalli.
 I absolutely am addicted to Coca Cola Classic and ketchup. I started this blog to keep in touch with others trying to lose weight. My weight has really gotten out of hand since high school all those years ago, but since getting married a year and a half ago I feel at fault since I should be cooking healthier.
 This blog is about my journey.
Overall, I want to lose 40 pounds.
I have never been much of a gym rat so this is my journey of taking up running, and bubble baths because my legs are getting tired.
I can't wait to make some new friends and start to look great.